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Plus Size Mom Life: The Struggle with Feeling Fat

“Why are you fat, Mom?” Has anyone ever had their children ask them this question? Why is your stomach so fat, Mom? Or better yet, have your kids tried to jiggle you and play with your fat? Hopefully, I’m not the only one out there because my kids think that this is hilarious to do! Oh, what I wouldn’t give to have the metabolism of an active nine-year-old!

Even if your kids think you have a few pounds to lose, do you consider yourself a fat mom? Does your weight bother you, or are you happy in your body?

If we aren’t happy with who we see back in the mirror, then there are positive changes that we can make for ourselves. The key here is making these changes for ourselves, not because of social media or social pressures.

woman and son

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Acknowledge Your Feelings as a Mom When You Feel Fat

The first step towards finding happiness and embracing self-love is acknowledging and accepting your feelings. It’s okay to feel unhappy or dissatisfied with your appearance, as long as you understand that your worth as a mom and as an individual extends far beyond your weight. Give yourself permission to feel, express, and explore your emotions without judgment.

  • Take time to reflect on what makes you feel this way
  • Talk to a trusted friend or partner about your thoughts
  • Understand that weight is just one aspect of your overall health and well-being
  • Be kind to yourself and avoid negative self-talk

Moms do so much for their families, but that doesn’t mean we don’t struggle with body image. Recognizing these feelings is the first step to handling them in a positive way.

happy mom and child

A Mindset Shift from Fat Mom to Happy Mom

In a world of unrealistic beauty ideals, embracing body positivity is powerful. As moms, we shape our children’s views of themselves by how we see our own bodies. It’s crucial to foster a healthy relationship with our appearance and show self-love. We need to set a positive example for our kids.

I’ll admit, I haven’t always set the best example. I often call myself a fat mom and compare myself to my fit, thin daughters. It’s a game I shouldn’t play, especially since I’m more than twice their age and have birthed five children. Yet, I still compare.

The term “fat mom” might make you cringe, but kids don’t hold back. They don’t use politically correct terms; they just say what’s on their minds.

Shifting our mindset to positivity is key to self-acceptance. Focus on your strengths. Practice daily affirmations, surround yourself with positive messages, and challenge negative self-talk.

  • List things you love about yourself
  • Compliment yourself daily
  • Stop comparing yourself to others
  • Learn to appreciate the body that has carried and nurtured your children

To all moms unhappy with their appearance, know that your journey to self-love is unique. By acknowledging your feelings, staying positive, seeking support, connecting with others, learning about body positivity, and practicing self-care, you move toward happiness and self-acceptance.

plus-sized woman in an airplane seat; fat mom challenges

Curvy Mom Challenges

Beautiful mamas, let’s address some of the situations where being a curvy mom may feel embarrassing or uncomfortable. Acknowledge these obstacles and develop solutions to overcome them with kindness and self-compassion.

Airplane Seat Woes: Finding Comfort Above the Clouds

Picture this: You’re all set for a family vacation, but as you settle into your airplane seat, you can’t help but feel a wave of discomfort. The armrests dig into your sides, and you feel like you’re encroaching on the neighboring passenger’s space.

But fear not, mama! First, realize that you deserve to be on that plane with your family, experiencing the world. If you are uncomfortable in your seat, do not hesitate to request an extension or a seat with more room from a flight attendant.

Airlines are becoming increasingly aware of diverse body sizes and are working to accommodate passengers better. You have the right to be comfortable during your journey, and speaking up for your needs is an act of self-love.

Theme Park Thrills: Embracing the Fun without Fear

Theme parks can be a fantastic way to create lasting memories with your family, but they can also present unique challenges for an overweight mom. Navigating roller coasters or fitting into certain ride seats can sometimes make you feel self-conscious or anxious.

Here’s the thing, mama: your size does not define your ability to have fun and enjoy thrilling rides! Many theme parks now offer size-inclusive seating options, including wider seats or harnesses that can accommodate various body sizes. Take a moment to research and plan ahead. Look for parks that prioritize inclusivity and have rides designed to accommodate all guests comfortably. You deserve to enjoy the joy and excitement of the experience as much as any other mom.

plus-size woman

Choosing Self-Care Over Societal Pressures

We’ve all been bombarded with the notion that our worth is determined by our dress size or the number on a scale. But as moms, we know better than anyone that our value lies in the love and care we give to our families. It’s time to let go of society’s beauty standards and focus on nurturing ourselves through self-care. Whether it’s indulging in a relaxing bubble bath, practicing yoga, or enjoying a favorite hobby, taking time for ourselves allows us to recharge and be the best versions of ourselves.

  • Find activities that bring you joy and help you relax
  • Set aside time just for you, even if it’s only a few minutes a day
  • Let go of guilt about prioritizing yourself
  • Focus on health, not just weight
fat mom, stylish outfit

Fashion Forward: Stylish and Confident

Being a fashionable mom isn’t about fitting into a specific mold; it’s about embracing your personal style and feeling fabulous in your own skin. The struggle is real to find fashionable and comfortable clothing that makes you feel confident. But fear not, my fellow moms! There’s a whole world of fashion out there that caters to your diverse shapes and sizes.

  • Look for clothing brands that cater to plus-size women
  • Don’t be afraid to experiment with colors and patterns
  • Dress in a way that makes you feel happy and comfortable
  • Confidence is the best thing you can wear

Nutrition: Fueling Your Body as a Fat Mom

Let’s be real—eating well as a mom isn’t always easy. Between busy schedules, picky kids, and the sheer exhaustion of life, it’s tempting to just grab whatever’s fast and easy. But what we eat makes a big difference in how we feel, and making a few small changes can go a long way.

Here’s the good news: good nutrition doesn’t mean dieting. It doesn’t mean starving. And it definitely doesn’t mean cutting out everything you love. It’s about balance and making choices that help you feel your best.

Here are some easy ways to improve nutrition without feeling restricted:

  • Protein is your friend – Lean meats, eggs, beans, and Greek yogurt keep you full longer.
  • Eat the rainbow – The more colorful your plate, the more nutrients you’re getting. Think veggies, fruits, and whole foods.
  • Healthy fats matter – Avocados, nuts, and olive oil aren’t the enemy. They help your body function properly.
  • Plan ahead – Having easy, healthy snacks ready (like almonds, fruit, or cheese sticks) can keep you from grabbing junk food.
  • Swap when you can – Whole grains instead of white, baked instead of fried, water instead of soda—it adds up.
  • Listen to your body – Eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’re full, and don’t feel guilty for enjoying food.

Good nutrition isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress. Making small, doable changes will leave you feeling more energized, less sluggish, and ready to tackle the day.

Weight Loss Tips for the Plus-Size Mama

Let’s get this out of the way: you don’t have to lose weight if you don’t want to. But if you do want to, let’s talk about doing it in a way that’s healthy, sustainable, and actually works for real-life moms.

Weight loss isn’t about crash diets or starving yourself. It’s about small, steady changes that fit your lifestyle and help you feel your best.

Here are some realistic, mom-friendly weight loss tips:

  • Start small – Tiny changes add up. Swap soda for water. Take a 10-minute walk. Eat a little more protein.
  • Move in a way you enjoy – You don’t have to run marathons. Dance, swim, garden—whatever gets you moving.
  • Eat more, not less – Sounds weird, right? But eating more nutrient-dense foods (like lean protein and veggies) keeps you full and helps with cravings.
  • Don’t skip meals – Skipping meals slows metabolism and makes cravings worse later. Eat balanced meals throughout the day.
  • Ditch the all-or-nothing mindset – One bad meal doesn’t ruin everything. Just get back on track at the next meal.
  • Track progress beyond the scale – The number on the scale isn’t everything. Notice how your clothes fit, your energy levels, and your strength.
  • Give yourself grace – Life happens. Some days will be great, some won’t. Don’t quit—just keep going.

The goal isn’t to be perfect. It’s to feel better, get stronger, and have more energy for the life you love. Weight loss, if it’s your choice, should be about you, not about pressure from anyone else.

plus-sized woman exercising

Exercise: Moving Your Body as a Fat Mom

Let’s talk about exercise. I know, I know—it’s not always fun, and it can feel overwhelming. But moving our bodies isn’t about punishing ourselves for what we ate. It’s about feeling good, having more energy, and staying strong for our families.

Here’s the secret: exercise doesn’t have to mean the gym. It doesn’t have to mean running. And it definitely doesn’t have to mean torturing yourself with workouts you hate.

Try these ways to stay active as a fat mom:

  • Dance it out – Crank up the music and dance with your kids in the living room. It burns calories and boosts your mood.
  • Walk and talk – Take a stroll while you chat on the phone or listen to your favorite podcast.
  • Strength training – Lifting even light weights builds muscle, and muscle helps burn fat.
  • Pool time – Water workouts are low impact and fun. Swimming or just playing in the water counts!
  • Find a hobby that moves you – Gardening, hiking, yoga—find something that feels fun and not like a chore.

The trick is to make it part of life, not a punishment. Start small and build up. It doesn’t have to be perfect—it just has to be something.

Mindful Eating: Enjoying Food Without Guilt

If you’re anything like me, you’ve eaten a meal while standing over the sink, scrolling your phone, or rushing the kids out the door. We don’t always take time to slow down and actually enjoy our food. But mindful eating can make a big difference in how we feel.

Here’s how to start:

  • Eat without distractions – Turn off the TV, put down the phone, and focus on your meal.
  • Chew slowly – Sounds silly, but really tasting and chewing your food helps digestion and makes you feel full faster.
  • Check your hunger level – Before reaching for a snack, ask yourself: Am I actually hungry or just bored?
  • Savor every bite – Choose foods you love, and enjoy them! There are no “bad” foods. Balance is key.
  • Stop when you’re satisfied – Not stuffed, just satisfied. Learning that difference is huge.

Mindful eating isn’t about restriction. It’s about appreciating food and listening to our bodies. As a fat mom, I know food guilt is real, but enjoying food without shame is life-changing.

Hydration: Why Water Matters for a Fat Mom

Drinking enough water is one of the easiest ways to feel better, but it’s also one of the first things we forget. Being hydrated helps with digestion, energy levels, and even weight loss.

Here are simple ways to drink more water every day:

  • Start the day with a glass of water – Before coffee, before anything. It wakes up your body.
  • Get a cute water bottle – Seriously, having a water bottle you love makes you drink more.
  • Infuse it – Add lemon, cucumber, or berries for a little flavor.
  • Set reminders – If you forget, set phone alarms to remind you to drink.
  • Drink before meals – It helps digestion and keeps you from overeating.
  • Herbal tea counts – If plain water is boring, try unsweetened herbal tea.

Being hydrated is such an easy win. You’ll feel more awake, your skin will thank you, and you might even snack less just from drinking enough water.

Final Thoughts

Moms, whether you identify as a fat mom or not, one thing is clear: our worth isn’t determined by our weight or jeans size. We hold our families together and are the heart of our homes. We deserve happiness, comfort, and self-love.

Prioritizing ourselves isn’t selfish. It’s necessary. Whether that means practicing self-care, buying cute clothes that make us feel great, or speaking up when something isn’t comfortable, we should do it. Life is too short to sit on the sidelines because we don’t feel good in our skin.

If you struggle with body image, know that you’re not alone. There are so many supportive communities out there, including places on Pinterest where moms share encouragement and body-positive fashion finds. Surround yourself with positivity, take care of yourself, and remember that confidence is the most beautiful thing you can wear.

So let’s show up for ourselves and live life to the fullest. No matter our size, we are worthy of love, joy, and endless adventure.

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Hi! I'm Jen, and I'm thrilled you stopped by to check out Insider Mama!

I am a certified life coach, mother of five, wife, founder of the non-profit Eye on Vision Foundation, entrepreneur, Christian, and friend. I live, play, work and worship in the Orlando, Florida area.

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